SO looney, your TLDR is that the game is balanced in 1v1 and USF is fine ...?
Yeah it might sound strange, but the game is balanced on most points. The only things I find unbalanced are the tiger ace and the building speed of kubels.
I understand it's frustrating, i always played allies way more then Axis, which was a huge mistake. You just learn axis unit composition and weaknesses way to slow.
I'm finally getting the hang after playing 600 hours lol. It's all about anticipating and thinking quick when playing Us. Axis is stalling and punishing allies who take to high a risks. The whole US arsenal is medium range with almost every unit, while axis is long range, except when it's late game when you get jacksons or priest. You're army value has the potential of being higher then his all throughout the early game phases. (Early early game, early mid game, early late game)
The Axis aren't really made for anticipating, they need a balanced army to counter all threats which is a weakness against an army which has the potential of having more recourses and more map control which they can use to soft counter your army with numbers.
This is why axis sometimes uses gren spam to get that early map control hoping you won't out spam him. When you see that it forces you to play different and skip a tech/unit for countering him which you need to anticipate to notice. If you don't counter his spam with AI and let's say build an at gun or captain in stead you sacrifice a lot of manpower for getting units you can't use at that moment. Which of course you don't want because you give Axis map control and faster hard counters to your army. Axis can't play as US and vice versa.
The assymetrical balance is frustrating in new players eyes. It's because you need to know/learn which/when axis build units and what your quickest way to counter them are.
Edit: add me on steam if I can help you with anything. my in game is Looney