Login

russian armor

Design the worst (plausible) commander ever

7 Oct 2014, 13:12 PM
#1
avatar of Lucas Troy

Posts: 508

Let's see who can come up with the worst commander ever. Here are some rules:

1. It has to be plausible. So no "Death Star ace" at 10 CP.

2. It can be horrible for any reason. Overpowered, underpowered, accentuates an already annoying aspect of game play, or just awful for any other reason.

I'll start:

OKW Logistics Doctrine

0 CP Valiant Truck Assault
The sWs decreases in target size to the size of a Kubel, moves and accelerates 20% faster, and gets heavy crush (15 munitions).

2 CP Supply Convoy
sWs trucks now arrive immediately whenever one is destroyed (passive)

4 CP Truck Armor
Adds an upgrade option that adds 100 armor to the sWs (120 munitions)

5 CP Rapid Deployment
sWs trucks now convert instantly into HQ buildings and can be deployed in enemy territory as well(passive)

6 CP Desperate Driving
sWs gain a "ram" ability that works basically like the T-34 ram (15 munitions to activate)






7 Oct 2014, 13:20 PM
#2
avatar of Katitof

Posts: 17914 | Subs: 8

Soviet ILOOSE doctrine:

Slap any 5 abilities that exclude:

-shocks
-guards
-ISU
-T34/85
-IS-2
7 Oct 2014, 13:23 PM
#3
avatar of FichtenMoped
Editor in Chief Badge
Patrion 310

Posts: 4785 | Subs: 3

German Infantry Doctrine

1CP: Reserve Infantry (passive)
Every Infantry squad gains two extra members

2CP: Rapid Replacement
Once activated, this bility will replace every killed infantry squad instantly and doubles the reinforcement speed of every squad

3CP: Mechanized Assault
Two Halftracks with Panzergrenadiers inside will spawn

6CP: StuG G assault guns gain the abillity to fire high explosive shells in order to support the Infantry

9CP: Incendiary Stuka barrage
The Stuka bomber will throw a cluster of fire-bombs over the targeted area
7 Oct 2014, 13:25 PM
#4
avatar of spam.r33k

Posts: 503

relic already won this challange

NKVD rifle disruption, anyone?
7 Oct 2014, 13:25 PM
#5
avatar of Greeb

Posts: 971

Soviet ILOOSE doctrine:

Slap any 5 abilities that exclude:

-shocks
-guards
-ISU
-T34/85
-IS-2


There are plenty of doctrines like that already :facepalm::facepalm::facepalm:
7 Oct 2014, 13:27 PM
#6
avatar of dasheepeh

Posts: 2115 | Subs: 1

The worst commander in this game has to be the Ostheer Infantry or Defensive one.
7 Oct 2014, 13:29 PM
#7
avatar of Strummingbird
Honorary Member Badge

Posts: 952 | Subs: 1

German Infantry Doctrine

1CP Artillery Field Officer
A veteran officer that allows you to pay through the nose to mitigate cooldown for the panzerwerfers you won't have, and the LeFHs you can't have.

4CP Tactical Movement
Your infantry can run. Yippee-kay-yay.

6CP Relief Infantry
Allows you to turn your infantry into worse infantry for the low, low cost of 120 munitions!

8CP Light Artillery Barrage
When they say 'light', they really mean it. Harms Zis guns no more than a light shower of rain would, for another 120 munitions.

10CP Fragmentation Bombs
Combining slow drop time, stupid and uncontrollable angle of drop, a high cost, and no damage to vehicles or artillery pieces for a higher cost than a USF mechanzied nuke drop, it's the Fragmentation Bomb!

7 Oct 2014, 13:39 PM
#8
avatar of Seeker

Posts: 83

Soviet Look But No Buy Tactics

2cp - Soviet Industry

3cp - T34-85

3cp - Is2

3cp - ISU-152

3cp - KV-2

Ostheer Scraps Doctrine:

0cp - Osttruppen

2cp - Osttruppen with flamethrower in 250 halftrack - Ostheer clown car

8cp - Osttruppen operated panther - will run into a building unless microed by 5 people

8cp - LeFH18 Howitzer

12cp - Broken Stuff - Get abandoned tanks and broken ones that are repaired at extremely slow rate
7 Oct 2014, 13:44 PM
#9
avatar of Beinhard

Posts: 161

German Pazer-Jäger Doctrine

0CP - Anti-Tank Package

Allows all infantry units to be equipped with Panzerschhreks and Panzer-fausts

2CP - Knights cross holders

Dispatches a single elite unit equipped with STG 44's and FG-42s.

5CP - Repair kit

All infantry units can now repair vehicles.

10CP - Stuka support

Stukas are availible to attack all units within the chosen sector

13CP - Jagdtiger Zerstöhrer Squadron.

Highcommand grants you three Jagdtigers with elite crews to eliminate all enemy armour.
7 Oct 2014, 13:46 PM
#10
avatar of Sarantini
Honorary Member Badge
Donator 22

Posts: 2181

Soviet Church Commander

0CP: Conversion (passive)
All churches on the map automatically convert to a FHQ and can be retreated to.
2CP: Priest
Call in a priest, has no combat power but can convert enemy squads into allied believers. Uses manpower to convert until the amount of the target squad is reached.
5CP: Resurrection, duration 180 seconds
When activated killed Vet3 soldiers respawn after 3 minutes
6CP: Fear propaganda
Makes nonbelievers retreat
12CP: Rapture (sacrifice 100 popcap in 10 minutes to start)
Raises the water level by 5meters, makes remaining land into deep mud, forces heavy rain and blizzard to start, enemy resource income is cut in half and enemy squads get the white phosphorus effect. All effects do not apply to your own units
7 Oct 2014, 13:51 PM
#11
avatar of Strummingbird
Honorary Member Badge

Posts: 952 | Subs: 1

Can't wait for a Soviet Church Commander mirror match :P
7 Oct 2014, 13:53 PM
#12
avatar of Sarantini
Honorary Member Badge
Donator 22

Posts: 2181

Can't wait for a Soviet Church Commander mirror match :P

Unable to because that will violate the no religion rule :D
7 Oct 2014, 14:02 PM
#13
avatar of Highfiveeeee

Posts: 1740



2 CP Supply Convoy
sWs trucks now arrive immediately whenever one is destroyed (passive)

...

6 CP Desperate Driving
sWs gain a "ram" ability that works basically like the T-34 ram (15 munitions to activate)




No shit I'd find these two some kind of nice.
7 Oct 2014, 14:25 PM
#14
avatar of Ginnungagap

Posts: 324 | Subs: 2

Soviet distraction commander
This commander is aimed to make the game unbearable for the enemy.

0CP Soviet winter (passive)
Permanently adds a blizzard. (also on summer maps)

1CP Troop distraction 30 munitions, lasts 80 seconds
Enemy troops randomly ignore orders.

3CP Cacophony 60 munitions, lasts 120 seconds
Enemy player hears randomly extremely loud noises.

5CP Signal distortion 60 munitions, lasts 240 seconds
Enemy player doesn't see his own units on the mini map or tactical map.

7CP Demotivational speech (passive)
Enemy player will hear randomly generated insults spoken via a monotone, robotic voice.
7 Oct 2014, 14:27 PM
#15
avatar of Sarantini
Honorary Member Badge
Donator 22

Posts: 2181

Soviet distraction commander
This commander is aimed to make the game unbearable for the enemy.

0CP Soviet winter (passive)
Permanently adds a blizzard. (also on summer maps)

1CP Troop distraction 30 munitions, lasts 80 seconds
Enemy troops randomly ignore orders.

3CP Cacophony 60 munitions, lasts 120 seconds
Enemy player hears randomly extremely loud noises.

5CP Signal distortion 60 munitions, lasts 240 seconds
Enemy player doesn't see his own units on the mini map or tactical map.

7CP Demotivational speech (passive)
Enemy player will hear randomly generated insults spoken via a monotone, robotic voice.

Pff another recycled commander, 2 of these abilities are already ingame for everyone to enjoy
7 Oct 2014, 15:36 PM
#16
avatar of Volsky

Posts: 344

Soviet Russia Doctrine

0 CP - Across the Volga!!1eleven: The cost to produce Conscripts is reduced to 120 Manpower, but they lose three of their rifles, and the remaining three can only fire five times.

1 CP - Blocking Detachment: All Maxims produced will automatically target your own troops. In exchange, for every two squads the Maxims kill (collectively), you will get a DShK machine gun!

2 CP - M-42!!!: Because who doesn't want 200 Manpower of useless!

3 CP - Loot: Conscripts will be armed with three normal Mosins and three Osttruppen Kar98ks if they somehow manage to make it to Vet1

12 CP - IL-2M Attacks: An IL-2M will attempt to strafe targets on the map. Unfortunately, due to poor coordination and the inherently terrible accuracy of most IL-2 crews in reality, their attacks are likely to strike your own troops and base.
7 Oct 2014, 17:32 PM
#17
avatar of Thunderhun

Posts: 1617

Guard Army:

2 CP - Guards

3 CP - PPSHs

8 CP - B4/152mm Howitzer

11 CP - IS2/ISU-152

11 CP - Il-2 bombing run

Mobile Warfare:

2 CP - Sdkfz 250 Mortar Halftrack

3 CP - G-43s

6 CP - Breakthrough/Jaegers

10 CP - Stuka Bombing Run

15 CP - Tiger Ace

Offensive doctrine:

1 CP - Mg-34

3 CP - Jaeger Light Infantry

3 CP - Obersoldaten Stg-44 Upgrade

6 CP - Scavange Doctrine's arty

12 CP - Jagdtiger

Late-war doctrine:

3 CP - Paratroopers

3 CP - M8 Armored Car

9 CP - E8 Medium Tank

9 CP - M7B1 Priest

11 CP - P-47 AT Strafe
7 Oct 2014, 17:43 PM
#18
avatar of MadeMan

Posts: 304

Soviet Support Tactics

0CP - Elite Combat Engineers - Combat Engineers take longer to train, but deploy with random amount of veterancy.

2CP - PTRS Prisoners! - Penals can be upgraded with PTRS rifles

4CP - Armored Detection

4CP - Camouflaged AT Guns

10CP - SU-76 Ace - Deploy an SU-76 Ace, a vet 3 SU-76 that can self repair for 60 Munitions.


7 Oct 2014, 17:44 PM
#19
avatar of Partisanship

Posts: 260

Soviet BOOM Mastah Commandah:

0CP: Lay Mines Fastah: Mines have 0.1 second preparation time.

1CP: Moar Mines: Engineers plant two mines instead of 1

2CP: Can't touch this: Enemy mines will never be triggered

3CP: Even Bettah: Mines are only 1 ammunition

4CP: Dah Bestah: Mines have double the AOE and damage.

Call of Duty Company:

0CP: Doritos and Mountain Dew: Infantry can heal themselves when idle (out of combat)

1CP: Knifing: Infantry can instantly kill models that come in close quarters

2CP: UAV: For every 3 model kill for any infantry you can scan the map for 10 seconds.

2CP: Doge: Infantry come with dogs that will quickly kill other infantry and tanks. Just because.

10CP: 360Noscopeheadshot: Can call-in a US sniper that will be jumping around and spinning all the time, works just like a Ostheer sniper, but whenever it gets a kill you get dubstep blasting out of your headphones and stereos.
7 Oct 2014, 17:51 PM
#20
avatar of Lenny12346

Posts: 307 | Subs: 3

relic already won this challange

NKVD rifle disruption, anyone?


Don't mock my strategies... End of story!

My commander, soviet:
CP0: Radio
CP2: Tankhunter Partisans
CP2: Exchange fuel into munitions
CP3: Advanced mining. Tankhunters/engies gain the ability to construct a very strong mine against german armor. Engine destroy 100% chance.
CP4: Exchange munitions into manpower

... My dream commander <444>3
1 user is browsing this thread: 1 guest

Ladders Top 10

  • #
    Steam Alias
    W
    L
    %
    Streak
Data provided by Relic Relic Entertainment

Replay highlight

VS
  • U.S. Forces flag cblanco ★
  • The British Forces flag 보드카 중대
  • Oberkommando West flag VonManteuffel
  • Ostheer flag Heartless Jäger
uploaded by XXxxHeartlessxxXX

Board Info

244 users are online: 244 guests
1 post in the last 24h
4 posts in the last week
35 posts in the last month
Registered members: 49210
Welcome our newest member, Shunnarah
Most online: 2043 users on 29 Oct 2023, 01:04 AM